This post actually started forming in my head early last week. Emmy was reading the book Holes for her class. She started crying because in the book Stanley has a rough life. He's really poor, he's bullied, and then he gets falsely accused of theft and has to do time in a boys work camp. We've seen the movie several times. This is the first time she's read the book. (side note: It annoys me that they have the whole class read books that are sad. A couple of years ago her class all read a book where the kid dies) Anyway, I explained that Stanley has to have all those bad things happen to him because it sets the book up for the happy ending. That sometimes things just happen for a reason.
I justified my saying that citing instances in my life when things worked out. If I had married my college sweet heart I wouldn't have my girls, and not having them kills my soul. Several times something has kept me from leaving somewhere when I normally would, then I come upon an accident that could have been me. I looked at several house having them fall through, then I found my house and loved it at first sight.
Then I think about the attacks in Paris, all the planes that have been blown out of the sky. The 7 year old found murdered and dumped in a ditch. I think about the look on Emmy's face when we visit the grave of her best friend so she can tell her Happy Birthday and take her a gift.
I can't reconcile those things with having a reason. There isn't one. No one should be gunned down while going about their day. People shouldn't have to live in fear and there is no lesson or reason good enough to justify a child dying.
I know things don't always work out. Sometimes bad things happen to good people, and there is no reason why.
So how do you explain to a crying kid who wants even the characters in her book to be treated fairly, that the world is full of bad things?