Financial/Relationship Peace Night 1

Last night was the first night of the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace class and the non Dave Ramsey relationship section.

It was pretty interesting and I will be going back next week for night 2. So far nothing surprising in the financial section. We talked about the importance of having an emergency fund of at least 1000 dollars as soon as possible, then paying everything off (however we didn't get into any details on that yet) followed by saving another 3-6 months of expenses. Also how important it is to save up to buy things like cars and furniture. I can honestly say I have never financed furniture. I'm sure if you ever stop by for a visit it won't be a surprise to you. I had my last living room furniture for 10 years. I think it could have lasted another few years but Abbey dropped an iron on it while crafting and singed a hole in it, plus I was moving in with Greg (if you weren't around 2 years ago for that don't worry it didn't last long) So, I found myself needing living room furniture again. To further make my point, I don't even have flat screen TV's because I can't justify getting rid of the ones I have because they work perfectly fine.

The relationship portion started with her asking us what marriage looked like to us. We were suppose to draw a picture or just list words. I drew a very crude stick couple the guy with a stick knife. I was just being funny, neither of my husbands tried to kill me (that I know of). I wanted to leave the page blank because that is a better representation. But we had to put something. The girl beside me drew a couple in a boat going off a waterfall. A girl volunteered to share her story. She had been married three times and all three men used her kindness and left her with no money and no retirement. I hate to say but It was nice knowing I am not the only person with bad relationship luck.

The things we were suppose to take away from this was we can't change our partners but we can change ourselves. I'm not really sure if she was saying we should change ourselves to be more what they want. If that's the case I can already tell you I don't want to do that. We should make decisions as a couple deciding together not letting it slide. And that everyone wants to feel needed, cared for, and fully accepted.

We should feel safe to talk openly without fear. We should have a signal that we need a time out so we can leave the conversation until we have composure to continue. The trainer was telling us that one guy said the signal for him and his girlfriend was  to flip each other off. Not sure that would calm me down, but who am I to tell someone what their signal should be.

So that was the high points of the night. I'm looking forward to next Wednesday for night 2.


Wednesday Confession #3

I survived and actually enjoyed the 24 hours I spent with my girls and their dad. Its funny how 2 people who didn't get a long AT ALL can co parent well and even take a small trip together with no one screaming.

I bought a grumpy cat stuffie. Yeah I am THAT much of a crazy cat lady.

I think my electric blanket is my favorite purchase of 2014.

I start my Dave Ramsey Financial Peace class tonight. I alternate between dreading it and excited.

Emmy caught the stomach virus, as she was just getting over the rash from Fifth's Disease. Its been a rough couple of weeks. Fingers crossed no one else in the house gets it.
Confession Wednesday Button

That time I saw Metallica in concert

I know many may be groaning because of the whole Napster thing. I agree that was pretty shitty. But you have to know I was a fan since forever. I mourned the loss of Cliff Burton. I laughed when the fired Dave Mustaine. I sang Enter Sandman to my children as a lullabye. I had my room plastered with Lars Ulrich posters. I even fixed my hair like his in the early 90's (gotta love that Metal hair) Bought my ex husband a TAMA drum set because that's the brand Lars has.

I have loved every sing thing they have ever produced except for St. Anger. That was pretty terrible. So I was super excited when the Death Magnetic tour came near me. I bought tickets for me and my sister. We wore vintage Metallica shirts and blasted their music on the way to the concert.

We got there just as Gojira was wrapping up and found our seats. I don't think I stopped screaming, dancing or singing until it was over. Easily the most fun I had in forever. If you ever want to pick up a guy go to a metal concert with another girl. We were turning them down all night. I don't know if it was because everyone was drunk or if it was that much of a shock to see women there. We were definitely a minority.

Anyway, the night was so much fun. A few years later I was talking to a coworkers boyfriend and the subject of Metallica came up. I said oh I saw them in concert...he said him too.

Then he said OMG there was a crazy lady in front of us. She was screaming and jumping around and it was hilarious.

I said hmmmm. Really?

He said oh, yeah, I taped her wanna see.....

If you guess that the crazy lady was me, you guessed correct. But I wouldn't have changed a thing.

Some interesting (probably only to me) facts are. Lars has a son a couple years older than my daughter (both of whom plays drums) and both of whom say their favorite band is Arctic Monkey. I have a cat named Arabella to prove it. At least to prove it on our end.

DISC again

So I had to do a DISC profile for a leadership training for work. I've done them before, I've done other personality quizes before too. I am so in touch with who I am that I could teach a class on me. (This link isn't the one we used for the training, but pretty close)

This training will be broken into 2 days. Today (yesterday when you are reading this) was the first day. I went in very skeptical, because in the past its here is the DISC what does that mean for you. Ok I know I am a High D (Decisive) and I (Interactive) I am a very low C (cautious) and S (Stability) I like stability but only stability that I am controlling.Anyway, I really thought it was going to be the same ole touchy feely with no outcome thing from the past.

This DISC started out different than the others because it told us what we are in our Natural state and in our Adaptive state. Pretty much when shit hits the fan all thoughts on someone feelings goes out the window and I thrive on the conflict. This is true. I say I don't like conflict and while that is kinda true its not really conflict I don't like, its being proven wrong or losing my control of a situation. Heath, I know you are reading this. Would you agree? Because I really think its spot on.

He teased me about being able to banter back and forth and guessed that when I really like someone and feel close to them I will be sarcastic and teasing toward them. I thought about my friend Jeff and how when he was learning to play the drums (he is a basketball coach total jock type so music was totally out of his comfort zone) I made signs that said You play like a girl (he coaches girls) and stop sucking ect. While some may think I was being a total dick, Jeff knew me well enough to know I need/want to be teased back. He had no problem giving it back as good as he got.

I'll share more when we have day 2. But so far I'm impressed and don't think its a waste of my time.


Things That Annoy Me At The Moment AKA Wednesday Confessions #3

  • I am taking another self imposed facebook break. If you send me a message I may read it but otherwise I just can't deal with actual facebook. 
  • I'm a sore loser and the Broncos being out makes me wanna puke, especially since I hate the Sea Hawks. Only thing that is making it better is the Steelers are also out. I can't decide who I hate worse the Steelers, Colts or Sea Hawks..... nope wait its definitely the Steelers. 
  • Not being able to fall asleep. I have no idea why I am wide awake at night but its slowly driving me insane.
  • Waiting for things before I can do my taxes. I know you have until the 30th, but I got my W2 from my job the first week in January. It makes me feel like everyone else should be that on top of things and stop dragging their feet.
  • I looked at my calendar for the next few months and nearly fainted. How did I get so busy? 
  • If you have to tell me that you are a hell of a probably aren't
  • Same goes for if you tell people how attractive you are. You are probably the only one that thinks that. 
  • To the guy  that ran across the road this morning....I will hit you, I have no problem with that. 
Confession Wednesday Button

Monday holidays are the best

I've been struggling to get back into a routine since the Christmas/New Years Holiday. I only worked a couple of days during those 2 weeks. When it came time to go back to work I was dragging for awhile. I was so glad to get another holiday so soon. Monday holidays are the best anyway. I love the extended weekend.

Doubly glad when Emmy came down with some weird rash. It looked like the rash she gets when she is around horses (she's allergic). After spending the morning of my day off at the Pediatricians office, it was determined she is totally fine. She just as Fifth Disease, which is some random childhood illness that is basically just a rash. She will be sporting the spots for about 3 weeks but she shouldn't have any other symptoms. The rash doesn't even itch. Anyway, after the appointment, I came home to get something productive done.

I organized the stuff stored in my attic. Painted my front door purple/pink. I've updated my house numbers too, I just haven't gotten them hung up yet.

I also turned a shower caddy into a spice rack. My kitchen is laid out a little odd. everything is on one wall. The stove is set into the counter and across from that is a door to a small closet. Most of the closet is taken up with my oven (its set into the wall) but it does have some space below it. I attached the shower caddy/spice rack to the inside of the door. Its the perfect location. I hate cooking, but now if I chose to I can actually access the spices.

Now that all of that is done, I need a nap.....or a day off.


That time I got arrested

Bet that got your attention. Now here's my mug shot....
Sorry to fake you out. Its not me, My middle name is Sheree not something that starts with an A. I actually have never been arrested. I do have a speeding ticket from a few years ago. What can I say I like to drive fast.

My girls discovered and have had way too much fun looking for names of people they know.  I admit I have enjoyed it too. I was surprised to see someone with my name. Grass isn't a super common last name.

I didn't think anything could be worse than drivers license pictures but mug shots beat them hands down. I have killed more time than I care to admit laughing at the pictures posted.


Here's a toast to my former stomach

I'm feeling sad today.

For Throw Back Thursday, A friend of mine posted a picture of herself from when we were way younger. She was in a Bikini. She looked great.

That reminded me of when I was that age. I was on the swim team. I did marching band. I had killer legs, and a flat stomach that of course I thought was poochy.

This isn't a post exclaiming how my new resolution is to look like this again.
 Because I am just too lazy. But it is to memorialize my flat stomach and nice legs. I feel like they at least deserve a shout out.

I May Be An Excitable Puppy

Why must making blog post titles be so hard? I swear I struggle with this every single time.... But anyway.

Yesterday I had my annual work evaluation. It was a painless process. I absolutely LOVE my job and my boss, and not joking my co-workers too, I only have one coworker in the office with me the others are about 100 miles away and I see them a few times a year. They don't even know about this blog so its not me sucking up its just truly how I feel.

Anyway, It went fine. I rated where I thought I would and got a raise. But, what struck me as funny was where she told me I could improve because it could hold me back. Now, let me add. I am fully aware that I do this action she was telling me about.  I just never thought of how it looked to others.

See, she mentioned my public speaking could improve. More specifically she said "Holly can continue her growth by increasing professionalism in meetings and presentations. Holly has an energy and youthfulness, which many relate to well, however sometimes a measure of reserve and more polished speaking presence is beneficial." She then explained youthfulness isn't the right word and she wanted to go back and change it. I know exactly what she means. I get nervous when I have to speak in front of a group. Even when I do professional development trainings for teachers. I get really nervous and when I get nervous my goal whether I am conscience of it at the time or not is to make everyone laugh.

That makes my trainings popular. That puts everyone at ease, but I can absolutely see how I can come across as a stand up comedian (albeit a bad one) or an excitable puppy doing tricks to make the crowd laugh. No clue how to fix the problem. I started to ask why they didn't teach this in school and then I remembered my speach class and the professor saying the exact same thing.....


Wednesday Confessions #2

I love Wednesdays and Confessions. Its my favorite blogging day of the week.

  • I have had trouble falling asleep for 2 weeks now. I have tried just laying there and taking sleep aides and either way I feel like a zombie all of the next day. Until its time for bed and then I am wide awake again.

  • I am ready for warmer weather but I did enjoy the schools 2 hour delay yesterday. 

  • I have am annual evaluation with my boss today. Fingers crossed for a raise.

  • My dryer belt came in the mail, I just haven't talked myself up enough to attempt to change it. 

  • I've signed up for Dave Ramsey's financial Peace and also a Relationship Peace class called PREP's Within Our Reach. 

Confession Wednesday Button

My complaints about how Gilmore Girls ended

I finished binge watching Gilmore Girls a few weeks ago, If you haven't finished it yet you may want to skip today's post. Even though it has been weeks I can't stop thinking about and obsessing about how it ended. There are just too many ends that I don't think are tied up.
The Luke/Lorelai/Christopher triangle. Christopher was a douche for not going to the hospital when her died had a heart attack, but he was still nicer to her than Luke had been. Luke handled the whole surprise parenthood thing horribly and I can't forgive him as easily as Lorelai did. Also if Christopher inherited so much money and he set his second daughter up with private schools and college and a trust fund, why didn't he do more for Rory?
Lane W'hy did the writers think it would be a good idea to write Lane's husband to have the career that she herself wanted. It just seems pretty crappy that she didn't become the rocker that she wanted to be.
Dean What happened to him, he went MIA
 Kirk Why didn't he propose to his girlfriend, and did he ever buy a house or move out of his mothers house. He had a half a million dollars in the bank, why not use it?
Michele Why after seven seasons he still spoke with such an awful accent, and why did he still have a job
 Mrs. Kim Where is Mr. Kim, and why is it ok for Mrs Kim to judge Loralei for not having a husband when she didn't have a man around either
Jess What happened to him? I know he was writing and working in the book store, but I liked him and thought he should have ended up with Rory.
Logan/Rory I really liked Logan, I'm not sure why they couldn't work it out. She could have found papers to work at in California. It just seemed like an abrupt ending.
If you've watched GG were you happy with the ending? What would you have done differently?


Chose Your Own Adventure December Recap

I'm a day late to the party. The Chose Your Own Adventure link up party that is. I love setting goals I even sometimes accomplish the goals I set for myself.

December's adventure was simplify. I took this pretty literal. Back in October I asked my girls what they saw the holidays looking like. What they wanted to do, what they wanted to stop doing. When December and the crazy holiday schedule game around, we followed through with what we wanted to do. It was selfish but it was stress free and fun which is exactly what we were going for. This meant the Christmas tree came down on Christmas Eve. We had opened our presents and the girls were on their way to their dads house so there was really no need to keep it up. There was really no point other than as yet another play structure for the cats.

January's goal is complete. I'm getting my list short so I actually have a chance of accomplishing them.
  • Finishing painting the doors in my kitchen
  • Finish painting the inside of the hutch
  • Finally drop the Goodwill donation box off. Its only been sitting in my hallway for 2 months.

Not Entirely Perfect

Bye Bye Red Kitchen

When I bought my house I loved that the walls had an actual color on them. Off white or any variation of the light "neutral" makes me anxious. I have no idea why. I wouldn't normally mind a red kitchen if it was bright. This red was dark. It made the kitchen look like a cave. It also had lovely wine bottle print border on the bulk head. Border so stuck on that I had to buy a steamer and steam it off. Don't just take my word for it. Here are some pictures I snapped of the kitchen.
Me and my sister. But behind us you can see the lovely wine bottle border. The valance came with the house too.  I'm a little horrified I am posting a pic of myself without makeup on.  

Now without further delay. The new paint
This is the same wall as above with the baskets. The color is not true in this  picture. It looks a little too gray. The baskets got moved to the closet peeking out on the right.
 This is more true to the color.
Now a funny story. My mom bought me a very large black hutch for Christmas. I envisioned it to be a bright red. I already had red paint that I had bought and then didn't use. So one night I started painting the hutch. It was a nightmare. The paint wouldn't stick to the hutch. It soaked in and looked horrible. So I decided to look around the house and see what I had. Which turned out to be left over chalk board paint. I wasn't happy about going back to black. But, the red wasn't working so I gave it a try. You know what happens when you paint something with chalk board paint? People just can't help but draw on it. 
I still have a long way to go before this room is where I want it to be. you can kinda see I have a oven on the wall. I haven't decided if I like it or if I want a free standing stove/oven combo. I know I want to tile the backs plash. The back of the hutch needs painted. It had really ugly fake birch wall paper. Trust me it was gross. This room has three doors, one to the coat closet one that is the front door and one behind the oven that I keep my trash can in. All of those need to be painted. I'm also thinking about the cabinets. I kinda want them painted but haven't completely made up my mind yet. That little bit of brown you see is where the washer is. Its a little alcove and then the hallway starts. For some reason the hall is painted the same color as the living room. It makes no sense since the hall is off the kitchen. I will need to have more paint mixed to finish that. I don't have a name of the paint because it was color matched to the cow print.

I still have a ton of work to do, but this is where I am at so far. I think it is a massive improvement. It doesn't look like a dungeon anymore.

Wednesday Confessions #1

You just have no idea how excited I am to have Wednesday Confessions back. I know I could still post confessions but its just not the same. I liked reading everyone elses confessions too.

  • I think about deleting people from facebook when they start re-posting hoaxes. People I swear no one will give you or anyone else money if you repost. Facebook does not require you to post shit to your page in order for you to retain ownership of your photos. Please do not even get me started on the satire sites that people act like are real and if you really wanna see how many people are your friend don't ask us to share a stupid meme about friendship. Ask us to help you bury a body those that agree are your real friends. It should go without saying don't actually kill anyone though.
  • I hate to admit I rarely use twitter. I can't decide if I should have a blog specific twitter or continue to use my personal one for both.
  • I am in dire need of finding a new series on either netflix or Hulu. I just finished all of Gilmore Girls and my evenings are seriously in need of more mindless television. 
  • It has only taken me 5 months but I finally got rid of the red kitchen. Tomorrow I will share pics. I'll even be sharing a pic of me without makeup and with foot long dark roots. It isn't pretty, you may have nightmares.
  • As much as I love doing the confessions link up, the phrase hump day creeps me out and I just can't say it. 
  • I haven't been able to get back into the back to work sleep schedule. I am either awake until after 2 or I take a sleeping pill either way I have been a zombie all week and as soon as its time for bed, I'm wide awake. 

Making Melissa
Confession Wednesday Button

2015 Predictions

 I am notorious for making resolutions and giving up on them before Spring is even here. Stephanie posted how she did on her 2014 predictions I think I like this method so much better. If I don't succeed at any, who cares it was just a prediction anyway.

  • I predict crossing 20 items off my 101 list. This list is starting to look like a bunch of resolutions that aren't going to happen. 
  • I predict I finally get all the rooms in my house painted. I did manage to get the kitchen done. So happy not to have to look at that dark depressing red. 
  • I predict finally setting up the domain name I bought months ago. This is after letting the domain I bough last year expire. I super duper hate technology.
  • I predict I fully commit to  swag bucks
  • I predict I start a celebration jar to remember all the good from 2015 so I am not focusing on the shitty times. 

Good Riddance 2014

I couldn't be happier to see 2014 end. It wasn't the best year of my life.

Most  of  this I didn't share on the blog because I have always tried, sometimes unsuccessfully to keep  things positive here. But, maybe I need to get the negative crap off my chest to move into 2015. Things like....
  • 3 days before Valentines Day my boyfriend of  4 years asked me to move out. The only explanation was that we don't live together well. I tried prying for details. Believe me when I say it wasn't worth it. I haven't gotten anything more detailed than the house was just too small for all of us and we fought a lot. I kinda thought it was all going well. So that tells you how much I know. 
  • I had to find a place to live, I rented my ex husbands house (he had moved out) with plans to buy it, however the appraisal (which I paid for) came back with a giant list of repairs that needed to be made before closing. Repairs he didn't really want to make. I fixed the roof, and built a deck rail, but in the end, I had to take my mortgage brokers advice and just look for another house.
  • That ordeal was a nightmare. Don't get me wrong I loved looking at houses, but every time I found one I liked it would go under contract with someone else. Once I found one I loved and its actually around the corner from the one I eventually bought. It needed a lot of work and the family didn't want to go any lower on the price so I walked away. 
  • My dad moved out of his sisters house and in with me. Even though I really don't have room for anyone and he is essentially living on my couch. Imagine if your dad was living with you, yeah that's how bad it is. I haven't been able to have company or a house warming party or anything. Add in the occasional bitch fest about how I am torturing him by not getting cable or satellite.
  • When I finally found the house I bought, my mortgage broker stopped communicating with me and I had no clue what was going on or when I was actually going to close. There was a problem with that appraisal too. The pictures showed what the bank thought was a hole in the side of the house, but was actually a reflection. So they had to go back and take more pictures. The lady at the bank was an incompetent idiot and didn't send the pictures as an attachment she sent them along with her bill for the estimate (The second one I had to pay for) Eventually this was taken care of and I did get to close. 
  • Pretty much I was out a lot of money just trying to get into my own house.
  • My best friend (A man I had dated a loooong time ago) stopped speaking to me, because I was still seeing the boyfriend that asked me to move. I want to contact him (the long lost best friend), but it doesn't seem fair to him so I haven't. But I miss him. I miss having him to talk to.
  • My family physician (Who I drove an hour away to see) left his practice and now works for the VA. While I am happy our vets have such an awesome doctor it makes me sad because I had been a patient for 14 years and really loved him. I miss him and still haven't replaced him. I'll eventually run out of my migraine medicine and will have to find a new doctor. 
  • I have had more migraines this year than I can remember having in the past couple of years. My insurance won't cover a drug that works quickly and with little side effects. The one they will cover causes me to feel dizzy and have numb arms and legs and a tingly face. But it eventually gets rid of the headache.
  • I finished Gilmore Girls. I just don't know what to do with my free time now. It was like watching my life story take place on screen. Hell some of the lines are even things I've said. 
  • I had to have minor skin surgery to remove a spot of pre cancer. According to my dermatologist, its when a spot has abnormal skin cells but isn't what they would classify as cancer yet. So now I have a ugly scar. 
The year wasn't all bad and there were some positives. I did end up finding a house that I love.The spot removed could have been cancer and the scar could have been bigger and uglier. At least I have insurance that will cover something for Migraines. I have an awesome job that I love. Its the first time in my adult life that I have had vacation and sick time banked, because going to work is actually enjoyable, so I don't take off every time I have an available day. I do see the silver lining on some of the negatives but it all really felt overwhelming and I spent a good portion feeling very lonely.
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