Do you Remember Me?

Have you ever had a week where you realize you talk and talk and talk and no one listens or even remembers who you are?

During the course of a week I realized some people I interact with for have forgotten everything in the 20 million letters and emails I have sent over the last 6 months explaining who I am, my role, and the changes with the grant/agency they have been use to. Not to mention the licensing changes but that is a different story all together.

After the 3rd time I was referred to as "The NEW Melissa" I had a break down. For one thing our jobs are different. Our titles are different. We are different. But again that is a completely different post. I whined and moaned on the shoulder of a friend who told me this.

"Because whenever dealing with a person or organization they have no direct felt emotional connection to, people classify each other in purely functional terms.
 
You are not Holly to most of these people, just as Melissa was not Melissa.  Your names are just shorthand for the role you fill in their daily routines- that of a point of contact.  If someone comes along and fills that role after you, they will be "the new Holly."  Likewise (omitted for privacy) is just a label for a function, as is (omitted for privacy)  as is every other entity they deal with.  The nametags don't matter- only what assistance or information they need to get, in order to get on with the day and go home.
 
This is more or less universal for the majority of people's business interactions.  When your license expires, you don't go to Latonya, the older African-American lady who just became a grandmother two months ago and who happens to work a desk job that most people would find boring but that she's secretly content with.  You go to the DMV.  Likewise, the DMV only really exists as "that place you go to get a driver's license."
 
Everyone does this.  There is not time enough in the day or room enough in the head to genuinely give a damn about everyone.  It's just that we only notice it in others: most often when we want to have our own effort and good work noticed and appreciated, and the world does not reciprocate."


See this is where I am odd, I guess. Because when I go to the DMV I go through Peggy's line. Because she takes pics of me so good I've used them on Facebook. If I could get her to follow me around with the DMV camera and snap away Id be happy. 
See what I mean? She is TALENTED 

When I shop at Walmart I go through Sam's line Or Melinda. Heck I have had my favorite cashiers ask where I have been if its been awhile since they have seen me....When I lived in a different city, I lived across the street from Walmart and a cashier came to my house and checked on me after I went away for Thanksgiving because she hadn't seen me. 

When I go to Bdubs I like that Grace asks me if I want Dr. Pepper or a Water. 

When I go to pay my car taxes I like Melissa and always ask how her daughter is doing because she had cancer not to long ago and I worry about her. 

If its true that there is no time to give a damn about everyone then I must be odder than I thought, because I carry on a conversation with everyone.....Beware if we are ever in an elevator together. 

I may cut you off in traffic and flip you off while screaming obscenities...but if we happen to be standing in line together I will start talking. I may even add you to facebook and send you and your family Christmas cards. 



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